Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune
If you have a PS3, you need to own this game. You need this game like you need air, food and water, because this is the game your PS3 was made for.

For a long time, video game makers have been touting the cinematic qualities of their games. But in the video game world, “Cinematic Qualities” usually add up to long, talky cut scenes and movies with awkward dialog, and Parappa-style button-pushing sequences that get annoying real fast. But watching someone play Uncharted is like watching an Indiana Jones style adventure where the main character sometimes dies, and restarts the action sequence.

Aside from a tendency to push you into shoot-outs after cut scenes, Uncharted offers a great blend of platforming elements and third-person shooting (which I much prefer to 1st person shooters). The graphics are realistic, yet painterly, the animation is superb, and the dialog and story are better than half the action movies that came through the theaters last year. Nicholas Cage and National Treasure, Eat your heart out.

There are a hundred things I want to say about this game, but time and space are limited today, so I’ll wrap up with the following

• Game Play: It’s a baby bear game–everything is just right.
  
• Character design–superb! The main character, Drake, is easy on the eyes, and the female character, Elena is strong, capable and so realistic looking. Don’t let the tank-top and shorts fool you, she’s like the anti-Lara Croft.
• Voice acting–awesome. Really. Nicholas Cage should watch and take notes.
• Environment–beautiful. The texture artists deserve a raise and a trip to an island as beautiful as the one they created in the game. And the programmers who did the water need some sort of medal proclaiming that they have designed the Best Water Effects in the History of Video Games. Evah! I got shot a couple of times because I was distracted by the ocean, or the pretty, pretty waterfalls.
• Chutzpah: This game is a platform shooter about lost treasure, Spanish gold, Nazi experiments, curses, zombies, modern-day pirates and germ warfare. It really has something for everyone, and it juggles every aspect in a most entertaining manner. I can’t recommend it enough.

I can’t help it. She’s like that older friend you had in high school–you know, the one who seemed so sophisticated because she’d been to Paris, and dated college guys and smoked and drank and done it. It took a lot to impress her, so you were always kinda flattered that she found you interesting enough to hang around with, even if she did keep borrowing money for sodas without ever paying you back–not that I’m saying Mrs. G is a welcher. I’m talking about that high school friend. That completely hypothetical, for-purposes-of-example-only cooler than cool, jaded friend whom you haven’t seen since graduation except once in the background of a photo of a party in Rolling Stone Magazine…but I digress.

So anyway, I’ve been kinda nervous about how she’d review Like a Thief… And how I’d take it. She posted the review today, giving it an 85. She used the phrases “It kicks ass – big ass.” and, “these characters are really cool.” which makes me feel both happy and a bit like I’ve dodged a bullet. Not that I’m gonna relax because, hey, there’s always next time.

And though there were things I disagreed with (like why she didn’t give it a score of 112–and yes, I know the scale only goes up to 100, but my baby is perfect–perfect, I tell you ;o) I have to admit, I giggled at her description of the setting:

…Set about 200 years in the future when everyone acts and dresses like they have watched The Matrix one time too many…

See, I thought it was kinda Kill Bill when I read it through after I finished writing, but I can see where all that black clothing might cloud the issue. And as to the aspects of the story Mrs. G didn’t like–the novella-length and characterization? Hey, there’s always next time.

Ann Aguirre–talented author; email correspondent of La Nora; and recipient of a kickass cool cover blurb for her forthcoming novel, Grimspace, from none other than the awesome Sharon Shinn–also wrote a review of Like a Thief in the Night. Which I also love. That one, I think I will stitch into a warm scarf to wear outside when it’s cold like it is tonight–terribly windy and barely 40 degrees. Brrrr!

I will keep those reviews close when someone inevitably finds my characters too unlikable to bear, or gets annoyed by my “everything and the kitchen sink” approach to genre, or notices that place on page 73 where I used the same adjective twice in two paragraphs.

Now, I’ll go to sleep. It’s a quarter to two, and the work-week from hell hasn’t yet let go of me. Good night.

* All quotes will be properly noted and attributed–perhaps on a matching pair of socks. As footnotes. Foot notes. Ugh! I think I really need sleep. I always get punny when I’m tired.